Sunday, July 14, 2013

Does the class reunion have to be like high school?

I guess it's an age-old question... can someone like me go to a high school class reunion and not feel like there is still a "cool kids" table? It might be the top reason why people don't even think about attending. Who would want to relive being ostracized? There were enough wall-flower dances and exclusions for a lifetime all within the time span of high school.

One of my goals in past reunions was to attempt to reach out to all of our 465 classmates. I never really had a group where I fit. I attempted to just be a nice girl on the fringes of many groups. For past reunions, I looked at phone books, mailed notes to parents still in town, and asked friends to round up their friends. I worked for hours trying to locate and communicate with people who had never been to a reunion. The Class of 83 has many members who never felt like members.

So imagine my disappointment that my reunion this year was planned exclusively via Facebook, with invites sent to friends of the popular kids, and to the exclusion of hundreds of my classmates. To attend the reunion, you not only had to have a Facebook account, but you had to pay through Facebook, too. The reunion was not on the typical weekend of past reunions. And three of four events were heavily themed with drinking (bar night, wine tasting, bar night). It's not too sensitive to our classmates in recovery.

Even at almost 50 years old, the cool kids table seems to have been replaced by Facebook Friends of certain friends. Even though I am on Facebook and knew about the event, I didn't attend-- having a little mini-protest. It might not have even been a protest (since I didn't tell anyone). Maybe it was a solidarity move to stand with the "not quite invited" among us.

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