the great tomato heist

So, I have been growing tomatoes, loads and loads of tomatoes. The goal was salsa. I was hoping to have some mild, some hot, some grilled pineapple, but what I really wanted was some yellow/orange salsa. My obsession with orange began some time ago. I cannot pinpoint exactly when, but more than 25 years ago I had an awesome pair of orange pumps with a matching purse. I know that sounds strange, but it is my only pair of pumps and my only matching purse... ever... really. I now live in the land of sensible shoes. And Keens doesn't make an orange men's sandal, or I would own it. Anyway... I love orangish yellowish tomatoes. I bought a plant. I watered it. And last week I saw the tomatoes just starting to turn from green into beautiful little orange tomatoes. 

Now before you are bored with my story and lose interest with my obsession with orange, here's what happened. I cut onions, peppers, garlic. I have the jars ready. It's salsa day. I go to the plant in the back yard, and it's as if the tomatoes were all called home by Jesus. Not a single tomato on the plant. How did that happen. The gate's locked. Hmmmm I settle for red tomatoes and make my salsa. 

As I head out later in the day, a man comes by on his bike. What do I see but his basket loaded with yellow tomatoes. My yellow/orange tomatoes. Not kidding. He asks me if I want to buy them. Of course, stunned, I just said, "Hey dude, look at the house. This is where you stole them." Before I finished my sentence he was off. 

Sometimes I think God just gives me a little bit of irony and a big chuckle. And today, God gave me a bit of a sanity check. I would have wondered for a long time where all of those tomatoes had gone. Silly me. Silly inner city jacked up neighborhood. Silly two-wheeled tomato-stealing loony. Oh well... just another day in the 'hood. Next year the orange tomatoes are planted across town at my mom's!